By Jamesia Donato, MD
Board Certified Neonatologist
Sunflower Neonatology Associates
As a former NICU mama, I know personally that our voices can be muffled. While I could tell countless stories of the unnamed families with whom I’ve run the NICU marathon, I choose to share my own journey to “the other side of the isolette,” where being a doctor didn’t protect me from marginalization. I remember it like it was yesterday. I’d gone in to see my OB for what I thought would be a visit that eased my worries. Instead, at 19 weeks and 3 days, my life turned completely upside down. The words hit me like a ton of bricks when my OB told me that my cervix was dilating and my body was preparing itself for delivery of my nearly half-baked twin fetuses. That news was terrifying, especially falling on the ears of a neonatologist. The next day got even worse when I was told “nothing could be done,” and it was suggested that I go home and “wait for the other shoe to drop.”
Had this doctor forgotten that I was a doctor myself? One who intricately understood the care I should be offered…and one who was keenly aware of the standard of care that I was guaranteed yet not offered? This high-risk OB doctor couldn’t see past my color and the assumptions and biases that came along with her privilege.
I knew I had to get a second opinion, and I knew how to advocate for myself. Advocacy is an irreplaceable tool for surviving pregnancy and childbirth. It is also a necessary skill to create policies that address social determinants of health, such as poverty, racism, and housing and food insecurity, which directly affect pregnancy outcomes.
After I spent three weeks at a different hospital and received the care I needed for an incompetent cervix, my little fighters made their debut. They barged into the world only four days past the threshold of viability at 22 weeks and 4 days and weighed 390 grams and 420 grams (less than one pound each). That’s less than a bottle of soda, y’all! My miracles rocked my world personally and professionally. The first week felt like an entire lifetime as I walked the thin line between mother and neonatologist, teetering between hope and reality. My girls nearly died more times than my mind allows me to remember. They both fought long and hard as micro preemies and experienced obstacles that at times seemed insurmountable. By God’s grace and the expert care from Sunflower Neonatology and the wonderful NICU nurses, they did not experience IVH (brain bleed), one of the most devastating diagnoses for micro preemies.
It was the longest, hardest and slowest journey of my life that challenged me personally and pushed the limits of what I knew could be possible as a Neonatologist. Just four weeks past my due date, my twins made it home and we never looked back! They are the smallest and youngest surviving twins in the history of the Overland Park Regional Medical Center NICU. They are thriving and letting the world know every day that they are here to stay! Every day that I get to hold and kiss them, I count my little blessings. I will never be the same as a Neonatologist. This journey taught me more than medicine ever could.
Download Our Health Matters 20th Anniversary digital edition to read more about Dr. Jamesia Donato and her work as a Neonatologist in premature deliveries.
